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Monatsarchive: May 2012

Cheddar Beer Bread Muffins

I’ve noticed something about you.

You seem to have no interest in healthy beer recipes. You want your beer recipes to be a flagrant indulgence of full-flavored stimulation. You want chocolate and bacon and sugar and whatever else I can manage to squeeze into your meal.

I like that about you.

No "semi-homemade" or "skinny" versions will do for your beer baking, you want it to be bold and extravagant, diet repercussions be damned. You also have no problem with my recipes that take hours, making Bacon Beer Jam with delighted voracity.

So it is by pure accident that I offer to you a recipe that only takes 5 minutes to throw together and less than 20 to bake, allowing you to get a fully flavored beer muffin on your table in less than a half an hour.

Although I know you would have been more than willing to spend much longer. I appreciate your tenacity.

For these Beer Bread Muffins, I used Lagunitas Red, a special release that’s just so fun to drink.

Beer Bread Muffins

Cheddar Beer Bread Muffins

Servings 8 muffins

Ingredients
  

  • 1 1/2 cups flour
  • 1 tbs sugar
  • 2 tsp baking powder
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 3/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese plus additional for topping, if desired
  • 2 tbs chopped green onions
  • 1/4 cup melted butter plus 2 additional tbs, divided
  • 3/4 cup beer

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven to 350. Spray muffin tins with cooking spray.
  • In a bowl combine the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, cheese and onions, stir until well combined. Pour in 1/4 a cup of melted butter plus the 6 oz of beer, stir until just combined.
  • Pour batter into muffin tins until each well is about 1/2 full. Pour remaining 2 tbs of butter onto the tops of the muffins, dividing evenly between each muffin. Top with additional cheese, if desired.
  • Bake at 350 for 18-20 minutes or until the muffins have puffed and a toothpick in the center comes out clean. Serve immediately, these are best right out of the oven.

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DIY Chocolate Molds & SprinkleBakes Cookbook Review plus Giveaway

Cookbook is a bit of a misnomer with SprinkleBakes. It’s more like an education. Like your best friend who happens to be an incomprehensibly talented pastry chef standing in your kitchen teaching you everything she knows about baking. Of course there are recipes, they range from redefining the idea of a basic cake to fabulously well crafted mousses, but it’s more than that. As with most cookbooks these days, you get more than just a compilation of recipes, it’s a catalouge of all the tips and tricks you didn’t even know were missing from your repertoire. SprinkleBakes is filled with instruction that not only inspires you to create your own works of art, it gives you the tools you need to do so. From simple to extravagant, everything you learn is accessible, no matter what your skill level.

How To: turn anything into a chocolate mold using just brown sugar

(Photo, Heather Baird)

This is the perfect addition to the kitchen of anyone who wants to learn more about the art of baking, no matter how long or short your’ve been at it.

I was so impressed by the tips and tutorials in this book, they seemed endless, like every time I flip though it I am bound to learn something new. This is a book that I will be referencing for years.

Here is a fun trick that I feel in love with right away. She teaches you how to turn just about anything in your house into a chocolate mold using just brown sugar. This is a great tip for anyone who throws kids parties and doesn’t want to invest in a chocolate mold that you’ll use once.

How To: turn anything into a chocolate mold using just brown sugar

Brown Sugar Chocolate Mold

Step One:

Fill a small bowl with soft brown sugar and pack lightly.

Step Two:

Place your object into the brown sugar and press down, compacting the sugar around the object. Objects that work best are fairly flat, with minimal detail. Heather uses a shell in her book and it turns out great. I used my daughters Alphabet magnets. If it doesn’t look right, remove the object, fluff the brown sugar and start again.

Step Three

Add chocolate chips (or candy melts) to a microwave safe bowl and microwave for thirty seconds, stir and repeat until chocolate is melted. Remove the objects from the brown sugar

Pour the chocolate gently into just the depression made by the object.

How To: turn anything into a chocolate mold using just brown sugar

Step Four:

Place in the refrigerator until set, about 10 minutes. Remove from the brown sugar and dust off as much sugar as you can. Run a very slow, very cold stream of water from your kitchen faucet. Gently run the chocolates under water until the excess sugar has been removed.

How To: turn anything into a chocolate mold using just brown sugar

Things to keep in mind:

These will not be shiny and smooth like those you get from a silicon mold, they will have a bit of a pocked texture. This might be what you want if you are going for a weathered look.

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SprinkleBakes Cookbook Giveaway!

Win your very own copy of this fabulous cookbook!

All you have to do is leave a comment in the comment section to enter! This makes a great gift for anyone you know who loves to bake, no matter what the skill level.  

Contest ends Monday, June 4th at noon PST.

Contest Only open to residents of the USA.  

Update: 

Random Number Generator choose #32, Emily!

Congrats Emily!



Chocolate Stout Covered Beer Caramels

You aren’t always aware of the nexus of a true obsession. It may only be in hind sight that the catalyst is revealed upon agonizing inspection of your past. For me, however, the spark was breathtaking, an obvious birth of a fixation that lead to this blog. That trigger was Bison Honey Basil Ale. A beer that begged to be turned into Beer Creme Brulee, my first post.

If you enjoy this little blog that I have, and are as fascinated as I am with turning beer into chewable treats, you don’t have me to thank, you owe the lovely folks at Bison Brewery a debt of gratitude. As do I, or course.

For this post, I used Bison Chocolate Stout, an excellent example of the genre.

Chocolate Stout Covered Beer Caramels

Ingredients
  

For The Caramels:

  • 12 oz bottle low hop Pale or Amber ale divided
  • 2 cups white sugar
  • 1 cup light brown sugar
  • 1 cup butter
  • 1 cup heavy cream
  • 1 cup corn syrup

For the Chocolate:

  • 1 1/2 cups 60% dark chocolate
  • 1/4 cup Chocolate Stout
  • 1 tsp flakey sea salt optional

Instructions
 

  • In a large sauce pan over medium high heat, add 1 cup beer (reserve the remaining beer). Allow beer to boil and reduce until thick and syrupy and only about 1 tsp remains, about 20 minutes. Set aside. (Note: if you want a lower level of beer taste, skip this step and substitute the "extract" you have just made with 1 tsp of vanilla extract in the later step that calls for the beer extract)
  • Line a loaf pan with parchment paper, making sure the paper goes up and over the sides of the pan, set aside.
  • In a large sauce pan over high heat add both sugars, butter, cream, corn syrup and remaining 1/2 cup beer. Stir until butter has melted and then stop stirring while the candy boils (you can occasionally swirl the pan), clip a candy thermometer to the side of the pot, taking care that the tip doesn't touch the bottom. Allow to boil untouched until the liquid reaches 244 degrees. The caramel will reach 200 degrees rather quickly,but will take 15-20 minutes to reach 244. The last few degrees climb quickly so stay close to your pot.
  • Once the caramel has reached 244, remove from heat. Add the reduced beer "extract" that you have set aside and stir until the bubbling has subsided. Pour it into prepared loaf pan, allow to sit at room temperature for 10 minutes, then refrigerate until set, about 2 hours. Cut into squares.
  • In the top of a double boiler add the chocolate and the stout, stir over low heat until melted and creamy, about 5 minutes. Don't over heat or your chocolate will seize.
  • One at a time, place the squares into the chocolate with a fork. Roll around until covered, remove and add to a piece of wax paper, sprinkle with sea salt if desired. Once the squares been covered in chocolate transfer the to the refrigerator, repeat with remaining caramel. Chill until set, about 10 minutes.
  • Keep refrigerated.

 

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Roasted Jalapenos with Bacon Jam & Goat Cheese

“In war, there are no unwounded soldiers.” – Jose Narosky

(Photo source unknown)

Thank you for all of the people who had fought, those who have died, the ones who will always nurse wounds and the mothers and fathers who had to stand back and watch it happen.

Thank you for the gift of peaceful days, Sundays with our families and the ignorance that allows us to enjoying without a full realization of the true sacrifice that was made.

To those who have died and those who were left behind, Thank You will never cover it.

Roasted Jalapenos with Bacon Jam & Goat Cheese

12 fresh jalapenos

3 oz cream cheese

1/4 cup Bacon Jam (posted last week on The Beeroness)

3 oz goat cheese

1 tbs butter

1/2 cup Panko

Preheat oven to 400. Cut the jalapenos lengthwise, removing the seeds and the inner membranes.

Place on a baking sheet and roast until soft, about 10 minutes.

Using a butter knife, smear the inside of the jalapenos with cream cheese.

Top the cream cheese with bacon jam.

Using your fingers, top the bacon jam with goat cheese.

In a microwave safe bowl, melt the butter. Add the panko and stir until coated.

Top the jalapenos with the buttered panko and roast at 450 until the panko has browned, about 5-8 minutes.

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Roasted Garlic Beer Butter Shrimp

Remember the Beer Cooking Scale I told you about last month, the one I want to invent? The one that would let you know the approximate level of Beeryness the final product has? This recipe is at both ends of that yet-to-be-invented scale’s spectrum. The beer butter has a kick you in the mouth beer flavor that will be heartily enjoyed by beer enthusiast, and the shrimp has a subtle note of beer in it’s finish. If you are a Kick You In The Mouth kinda person, cooking for a Maybe Just A Touch kind of person, this will satisfy you both. You get a butter full of intense beer flavor to slather onto whatever you so choose, and your little friend gets a plate of shrimp with slight notes of beer. Harmony between the two of you once again.

For this recipe I used a Saison brewed with sage, giving really great herb notes to the finished product. This is  a special release beer from Epic Brewing called  Utah Saison Sage #2.

If you can’t find this beer, look for a Saison with herb or citrus notes.

Roasted Garlic Beer Butter

1 head of garlic

1 tbs olive oil

1/2 cup Saison beer

1 stick of butter, softened

Preheat oven to 425. Rub several layers of the white papery skin off the head of garlic, leaving a light layer still in tact to keep the bulb together. Cut off the top point of the head, exposing the cloves inside.

Place on a sheet of foil, drizzle with olive oil and fold the foil tightly around the garlic. Place in a baking dish and roast in a 425 degree oven until the cloves are soft, about 20 minutes. Remove from oven and allow to cool.

While the garlic is roasting, add the beer to a pot on the stove. Cook until reduced to 3 tbs, about 10 minutes. (To lower the level of beer flavor in the butter, reduce 1/4 cup of beer by half.)

In a food processor, add the softened butter and the beer. Squeeze the head of garlic until the cloves push out, adding just the cloves to the food processor and discarding the papery skin.

Process the butter until smooth. Add to an air tight container and store in the fridge.

Roasted Garlic Beer Butter Shrimp, two methods

 3 tbs beer butter

10 shrimp

pinch of salt and pepper

Metohd one: Grilling

Preheat grill. Melt the beer butter in a microwave safe dish. Skewer the shrimp with a heat safe skewers(or water soaked wooden skewers). Sprinkle with salt and pepper, brush liberally with melted butter. Grill until pink and cooked through, about 2-3 minutes per side. Brush occasionally with butter while cooking.

Method two: Stove Top

In a pan over medium high heat, add the butter and stir until melted. Sprinkle the shrimp with salt and pepper, add to the pan and saute until cooked through about 5 minutes.

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Bacon & Panko Crusted Scallops

Bacon wrapped scallops sound like such a great idea, don’t they? Two fabulously delicious meats teaming up for one incredible bite. There’s an issue. A  huge, unavoidable, technical glitch: the cooking times. Like most great loves lost, the deal breaking fundamental flaw is timing. Bacon takes somewhere around 3 times as long to cook as scallops, giving you two options: Hideously dry, overcooked scallops or semi-raw undercooked bacon. Yum, appetizing.

If you really want to fly in the face of Kosher and wrap your shellfish with pork, you have two really great options:

Wrap your scallops in prosciutto, like I do here, only needing attention on the scallops cooking time since proscuitto can be served any where from raw to cripsy,

or

Bread your scallops with crushed bacon and Panko, which I do below.

Either way, pork and scallops are harmoniously reunited. I knew those two crazy kids would work things out.

Bacon & Panko Crusted Scallops

4 strips of bacon, cooked

1/3 cup panko

8 large scallops

1/4 cup flour

1/4 cup milk

2 eggs

1/2 tsp salt

3 tbs canola oil

Roughly chop the bacon and add to a food processor along with the Panko, pulse until well combined and the bacon is reduced to crumbs, remove from food processor and add to a bowl. 

Add the flour to a plate.

Add the milk, eggs and salt to a bowl and beat to combine. 

Dry the scallops very well and dredge in the flour, knocking off any excess, dip in the milk/egg mixture and then into the Panko/bacon bowl, coating well. Place in the refridgerator for ten minutes to allow the coating to stick. 

Heat oil in a skillet over medium-high heat. Cook scallops on both sides until golden brown, about 2 minutes per side, taking care not to over crowd the pan. 

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This is what happens when you try to photograph food while hanging out with a 2 year old:

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Beer and Bacon Jam

Beer and bacon in a spreadable form, this may be the best thing to ever come out of my kitchen. It is a simple food, a few ingredients that over time become large with flavor and possibilities.  A conversation piece, something your guest won’t forget, or a handmade gift for those carnivorous beer lovers in your life. Although the cooking time is long, your active time is relatively short.

This is the perfect way to spend a lazy sunday afternoon: The smell of bacon welling up around you in a sun soaked kitchen with Delta Spirit rising from the speakers and the rest of the demanding world no longer existing. Just you, music and the transformation of ingredients happening on your stove. Cooking, creating, lingering in my kitchen gives a very grounded feeling to my over extend life. A reminder that I need to slow down and enjoy, just be. A recipe that ask little of me other that the time it takes to simply simmer is a reminder of that, just be.


Beer & Bacon Jam

Ingredients
  

  • 12 oz thick sliced bacon 8-10 thick strips
  • 4 cloves of garlic smashed
  • 1/2 cup yellow onion chopped
  • 1 1/4 cups amber ale or imperial stout divided
  • 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
  • 1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
  • 2/3 cup brown sugar

Instructions
 

  • In a large pot or dutch oven, cook the bacon, working in batches if neccessary. Remove the bacon from the pan and allow to cool and then roughly chop. Drain off the bacon grease from the pot, leaving only about 1 tbs bacon drippings in the bottom of the pot. Return the pot to heat and cook the onions until soft and translucent, about 3 minutes. Add the garlic and stir for about 30 seconds. Add 1 cup beer and both vinegars, scraping to deglaze the bottom of the pot. Add the brown sugar and the bacon, reduce heat to maintain a simmer. Place the lid on the pot at an angle, allowing to vent the steam. Cook until reduced to a thick and syrupy consistency, stirring occasionally, about 45 minutes. Transfer to a food processor along with remaining 1/4 cup beer and pulse until most of the large pieces have been chopped.
  • Serve at room temperature.

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Herbivoracious Cookbook Review & Caramelized Apple and Blue Cheese Crostini

At a book release party for Michael Natikin’s Herbivoracious I fill my plate past capacity with the gorgeous spread laid out at a Culver City restaurant, his cookbook’s recipes incarnate. It isn’t until I’m halfway though the incredible tasty bites that I realize that it’s vegetarian. Of course it is, its Herbivoracious. This is how I like my vegetarian food, as a celebration of produce rather than and explanation for missing meat. This is what Michael has managed to do, turn out an entire book of recipes so full and beautiful that the addition of animal protein would be an imposition. Recipes that range from perfectly simple to complex and inspirational.  This isn’t a book for vegetarians, or for accepting meat eaters, it’s a book for everyone who loves food.

Cookbooks, in a real life paper and page form, are even more important to me that ever. As I pull out my Grandmothers copy of The Joy of Cooking, with her notes scrawled in the margins with a soft pencil I can feel a connection with her that would have been lost if eReaders had been invented 50 years ago. I feel her in the pages, and she is still able to teach me what I was never able to learn when she was alive. I want this for my daughter, for my future Grandkids, another piece of me to be found in an old box, when they are ready to receive it. Cookbooks should be the last thing to be digitized, you won’t pass down a kindle, make notes in the blank spaces with a number 2 pencil.

But the main reason to buy cookbooks is simple: recipe testing. Cookbook recipes are tested, over and over, to insure that the unchangeable print is perfect. Bloggers make a recipe once, giving online recipes a much higher rate of flaws, my own included. You are our testers and your feedback gives us insight in how we write the recipes and if we later make changes to what we have already posted. With bloggers cranking out up to 10 recipes a week, you can hardly blame us. But cookbook authors take much more time and care, agonizing over measurements, yields, terms and times, getting hundreds of hours of opinions and feedback because once it prints, that’s it. No updating posts, or responding to comments, the recipe has to be perfect.

That is why you should buy cookbooks.

Even if you aren’t a vegetarian, ESPECIALLY if you aren’t a vegetarian, Michael Natikns book is a must own celebration of produce. Buy it, make notes in the margins, and pass it down to endless generation of food loving humans. 

Caramelized Apple and Blue Cheese Crostini

Recipe from: Michael Natkin, Herbvoracious 
Makes 16 crostini
20 minutes

  • ½ cup loosely packed fresh tarragon leaves
  • 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
  • Kosher salt
  • 16 thin slices of crusty baguette
  • 1 tablespoon unsalted butter
  • 2 small apples such as Pink Lady, cut into 16 wedges
  • Tiny pinch of cayenne pepper (Don’t be afraid of this, it put this dish over the top!)
  • Freshly ground black pepper
  • ¼ cup blue cheese (such as Blue de Causses or Gorgonzola dolce), at room temperature
  • Flaky sea salt (such as Maldon) or large crystal sea salt (such as red Hawaiian salt)
  • (I added a drizzle of raw honey)

1.Preheat oven or toaster oven to 400 degrees.

2. Set aside 32 nice looking tarragon leaves. In a mortar and pestle or mini food processor, roughly puree the remaining tarragon with the olive oil.

3. Brush the baguette slices with the tarragon oil, reserving the crushed tarragon. Toast in the oven (on a baking sheet) or toaster oven until golden brown and crispy, about 5 minutes.

4. Melt the butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Cook the apples on in a single layer, working in batches if needed, until both sides are golden brown and somewhat tender, about 5 minutes. Season with a pinch of cayenne pepper and several grinds of black pepper.

5. To serve, arrange two slices of cooked apple on each crostini. Top with ½ teaspoon of the blue cheese, a speck of the crushed tarragon, two whole tarragon leaves, and a few grains of sea salt. (Drizzle with raw honey, if desired)



Beer Popsicles: Lemon Pale Ale

As summer heats up, so does my longing to add beer to everything I consume. I linger on the idea of changing classic recipes into beer recipes far longer than my busy day should allow. How would I add beer to a Tarte Tatin? What about an Blueberry pie? Or Eggs benedict? What beer would I use? Although I get lost in recipe development several times a day, it tends to make a long commute on a Los Angeles freeway that much more bareable.

Due to recent move, I’ve been a bit handicapped by my lack of access to a familiar kitchen and all of my culinary tools. I’m slowly working my way back to feeling normal, that slight feeling of alien unfamiliarity when I get home  has begun to subside and my subconcious is starting to accept that the new place that I sleep, is now my home.

Beer popsicles are a fun addition in any adult party. You can play with flavor combinations (strawberry basil, orange jalapeno, blueberry lime) or just use plain 'ole untouched beer. If you have little ones around, make sure to keep these labeled well and separated from the kiddie ones.  If you are worried about a tiny human being handed the wrong flavor, use colored popsicle sticks for the kids and plain boring wood ones for the grown ups. You can buy popsicle sticks, colored and plain at most craft stores or on Amazon. This is the popsicle mold I used, but just about any hollow vessel will work.

I used Pike Brewing Naughty Nellie for these. With flavors of hops, grapefruit and citrus, it gave a sour punch that I really loved. This is a recipe that can take a hoppier beer because there is no cooking involved. Experiment with your favorite pale ale, you have a summer full of back yard barbecues to get it just right.

Beer Popsicles: Lemon Pale Ale

Servings 6 popsicles

Ingredients
  

  • 1/3 cup fresh squeezed lemon juice about 4 large lemons
  • 1/4 cup sugar
  • 1 cup pale ale or IPA

Instructions
 

  • Mix all ingredients together in a pitcher or measuring cup with a spout, stir until sugar has dissolved.
  • Pour into popsicle molds and freeze for at least 6 hours.
  • Run molds under hot water until the popsicles release.

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Baked Brown Sugar Chicken Wings With Roasted Red Pepper Cream Sauce

People always ask what I prefer: sweet or savory. The truth is I have a strong pull to mix them together, blur the lines. I add savory ingredients to my baked good and sweet ingredients to my savory dinners.

The best fried or baked chicken recipes there are have a touch of sugar. It’s this magic secret ingredient that just seems way to simple to make such a huge impact. If you already have a baked or fried or even grilled chicken recipe that you are perfecting, add a tsp of brown sugar and see how it gives an entirely new dimension to the flavor. 

And the sauce combines two of my favorite kitchen staples: roasted red peppers and goat cheese. Both are savory ingredients with a touch of sweetness. 

I baked these, more or less because it was easier. But they would also lend themselves well to frying, if you are brave enough. 

Brown Sugar Chili Chicken

2 tsp brown sugar

1 tsp salt

1 tsp onion powder

2 tsp dried minced garlic

2 tsp smoked paprika

2 tsp chili powder

1 tsp black pepper

2 tbs olive oil

8 chicken legs or wings

1/3 cup roasted red pepper, chopped

2 oz goat cheese

1/4 tsp salt

2 tbs sour cream

Preheat oven to 425.

In a plastic bag, or a bowl,  combine the first 7 ingredients. Drizzle the chicken with olive oil and rub to coat. Add the chicken to the bag (or bowl) and toss or shake bag until well coated.

Place on a baking sheet and bake for 12 minutes, turn the chicken over, and continue to bake until cooked through, about 10-15 additional minutes (depending on the thickness of your chicken).

In a food processor, add the roasted red pepper, goat cheese salt and sour cream, process until well combined.

 

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Strawberry Beer Lemonade

Summer is almost here. Barbecues, lazy afternoons on the porch swing, long days at the beach, music and card games on the patio until dawn. I realize that a fridge full of craft beer doesn’t always please the masses, but I do want to impart those flavors that are so beautiful anyone can enjoy them, into nearly everything that comes out of my kitchen.

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Jalapeno Corn Waffles With Sriracha Maple Syrup & How To Survive Online Bullies

Don’t Feed The Trolls: How to Survive Online Bullies

In the age of living online, the greatest gift are the people you meet. The biggest drawback? The people you meet. Once a skeptic of online friendships, I’ve felt the connections made across the globe from one screen to another. A richness lent to my world through knowing people who live in such far off places, we never could have connected, seen our similarities, shared our thoughts and support, had it not been for two lap tops with internet connections. I’ve also seen the dark side of the vail that the computer brings, an entire society of online bullies waiting with snark and nastiness to prey on anyone with a voice. 

The blog comments I’ve seen from online bullies rage wildly from strange with a twist of insanity, to angry and hateful. The following is a list of comments I’ve seen posted to online blogs, to people who get paid little or nothing for the recipes that they post:

"I hope your baby dies. I hate you"

"Ugh, I can’t stand this girl. Will you just shut up already?!"

"This recipe sucks, it’s probably why your husband left you."

"I bet you just adopted that baby so you could get more blog hits."

"This is the most disgusting recipe I’ve ever made in my life. I substituted [lists 3 major substitutions] and it was horrible! Think before you blog, you stupid B—-!"

"It’s no wonder her husband died if she cooks like this! She pretty much killed him herself, is she trying to kill my husband too?"

I know. Horrifying. People fail to realize that another human, possibly a stay at home Mom looking for a connection to the outside world, a widow, an introvert with crippling agoraphobia, or just and average joe, will read that and be incredibly hurt. We all remember the worst comment that was ever posted to our blogs, the sting from a complete stranger who’s hate has invaded our world. I’ve recently seen two celebrities melt down on Twitter, responding to the nasty comments, defending themselves, lashing out, retweeting insults, indulging those Trolls who seek to disperse hate. 

Celebrity, blogger, or just an average mom with a twitter following, here are some rules to help us all cope:

Five Rules to Survive Online Bullies

1. Don’t Feed the Trolls. Don’t respond, engage or even post comments made out of sheer hate and anger. If a comment is just made to hurt, there is no reason to post it and you have no moral or civic obligation to do so. Delete the comment and shake the thought of it from your head. 

2. Find Power In Silence. To stay silent and to be silenced are not the same thing. There is powder in silence, feel it. There is no response to a bully or a nasty comment that makes you look cool or superior, you are only wallowing in the mud by responding. 

3. Feel Pity. Child Actor turned writer, Mara Wilson said on her blog recently:  "Very few intelligent, successful, attractive, confident, happy people spend their time bashing people they have never met. Just be glad you are not that person." A comment a stranger makes about you says a lot more about them then it will ever say about you. 

4. Strangers Will Defend You. More often than not, when I see a nasty comment posted on a blog, I watch others rush to the aid of the blogger. People who don’t know that blogger or the commenter, but who do know right from wrong, and are quick to rush to your defense. 

5. Feel Important. No one throws rocks at Tiny Tim. If you are a blogger or a celebrity, the negative comments you receive will rise in direct proportion to how important people think you are. If they didn’t think of you as successful, they wouldn’t even bother. Negative comments are a direct result of doing something right, try to think of it that way. 

I try to follow these rules on both this blog, as well as my other blog, The Beeroness, which has garnered a much higher level of praise as well as exponentially higher level of nastiness. With the good comes the bad, finding your own inner filter will help you enjoy more of the experience. 

In a completely unrelated note, these Jalapeno Corn Waffles are perfect for brunch, or to serve with Fried Chicken. And you’ll want to drink the Sriracha Maple syrup on it’s own. 

Jalapeno Corn Waffles with Sriracha Maple Syrup

Waffles:

1 cup fine yellow corn meal

1/2 cup flour

1 tsp baking powder

1/2 cup corn kernels 

1 large jalapeno, chopped, stem and seeds removed

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 cup cheddar cheese

1 tbs brown sugar

1/2 cup melted butter

1 cup whole milk

1 tbs canola oil

1 egg

For the Syrup:

1/4 cup real maple syrup

1 tsp sriracha chili sauce

(Makes 4-6)

Preheat your waffle iron. 

In a bowl, combine the corn meal, flour, baking powder, corn, jalapeno, salt, cheese, and brown sugar, mix. In a separate bowl, add the melted butter, milk, oil and the egg, beat until well combined. Make a well in the dry ingredients, add the wet ingredients and mix until just barely combined. Spray waffle iron with cooking spray if recommended, cook in waffle iron according to manufactures specifications. 

Mix the maple syrup and sriracha and serve with the waffles. 


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Beer Braised Chicken Sliders With Hoisin Beer Barbecue Sauce

There’s a good chance that when you think about cooking with beer, a meat recipe comes to mind. Your Dad’s beer marinated ribs? Beer can chicken? Beer braised pork? There’s a good reason for that.

Not just for the spectacular flavors that craft beer can impart on the meat, but because beer, especially high acid beer, acts as a meat tenderizer by breaking down tissue.

For this recipe you are free to run the spectrum of beer styles. Most recipes I write will be accompanied by stern warning about using any beer other than the type called for, this isn’t one of those recipes. That IPA I keep shaming you into avoiding? You can even give that a try. My gut instinct with a recipe like this was to use a light, high acid beer with herb notes (basil, sage, oregano) but I opted for a porter to test my "Any Beer Goes" theory.

The porter effect, as I am now calling it, gave a "meatier" quality to the chicken. Which turned out wonderfully, and gave this a bit of a pork taste.

The beer I used for this recipe was the Payback Porter by Speakeasy. It’s a fantastic choice for a porter because the notes are similar to those I see in barbecue sauces and rubs: smoke, coffee, cocoa, and molasses.

Next time I’ll use a beer with a high acid content for a little contrast, but as far as the beer that you pick, experiment and let me know how it goes.

 

Beer Braised Chicken Sliders With Hoisin Beer Barbecue Sauce

Ingredients
  

For the Barbecue Sacue:

  • 2 tbsp extra-virgin olive oil
  • 3 cloves fresh garlic minced
  • 1 cup hoisin sauce
  • 1 tsp chili powder
  • ¼ cup low sodium soy sauce
  • 1 cup beer

For The Braised Chicken:

  • 2 tbs canola oil
  • 3 chicken breasts boneless and skinless
  • 1/2 tsp salt
  • 1 1/2 cups beer
  • 1/2 cup chicken broth
  • 15 mini Hawaiian bread rolls

Yield: 15 sliders

    Instructions
     

    • Heat 2 tbs canola oil in large pot or Dutch oven. Sprinkle the chicken with salt on all sides. Place in the pot and cook on each side until browned, about 2 minutes per side. Cover with 1 1/2 cups of beer and 1/2 cup chicken broth, cover and cook for 15 – 20 minutes or until chicken is completely cooked.
    • While chicken is cooking, prepare barbeque sauce by warming olive oil in large saucepan over medium-high heat. Add garlic and sauté for 30 seconds; add 1 cup beer, hoisin sauce, chili powder and soy sauce. Cook for 10-15 minutes or until thickened and reduced, remove from heat.
    • When chicken is cooked, remove from pot and allow to cool. Using two forks, shred chicken to as thin slices as possible, then add to hoisin barbeque sauce pan, tossing well to coat.
    • Split rolls in half across the middle to resemble small sandwich buns, fill with chicken.

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    1 Minute Microwave Cupcake

    Microwave mug cakes first cake into my consciousness about 10 years ago through the pre-facebook existence of the email forward. I found them to be completely smarmy, the culinary equivalent of a Jerry Springer episode. My first though was, "Oh, yeah like I need QUICKER ways to get fatter." Email deleted.

    But then I found myself in my new place, without the gas turned on yet, but with a new microwave and the urge to celebrate.

    I caved.

    I made my little family microwave cupcakes to celebrate the move and the fact that I was finally back in a kitchen. Just remember that if you find yourself with unexpected guests and only about 5 minutes to whip up a dessert, this is a viable option.

    The secret to making these Smarmy Mug Cakes in cupcake form, is the baking cups. I love the crap out of these things. I always use them to make cupcakes because they are much cuter than the regular cupcake papers, and they don’t need muffin tins, just place them on a baking sheet and fill to half capacity. These were left over from Taters, Lets Have A Ball party and bought them from Sweet Lulu, but you can also buy plain white ones on Amazon. The trick is to only fill them half way.


    Smarmy Mug Cake, Cupcake Edition

    1/4 cup dark chocolate chips

    2 tbs butter

    1 egg

    1 tbs oil

    1 tbs milk

    1/4 cup sugar

    pinch of salt

    2 tbs cocoa powder (unsweetened)

    2 tbs flour

    1/8 tsp baking powder

    Frosting:

    1/2 cup (4oz) cream cheese

    1/4 milk

    1/3 cup powdered sugar (plus more if you want it sweeter)

    2 tbs cocoa powder

    (if you don’t like cream cheese frosting, heat 3 tbs milk or cream in the microwave until steamy, then pour over 1/3 cup chocolate chips, stir until melted. Pour the chocolate sauce over the cupcake. It will be messy, but delicious)

    (Makes 3)

    In a microwave safe bowl, add the chocolate chips and the butter. Microwave for 20 seconds, stir and repeat until melted.

    In a separate bowl, add the egg, oil, milk, sugar and salt and beat with a fork until well combined. Add the melted chocolate and stir again. Sprinkle the cocoa powder, flour and baking powder over the egg mixture and stir again with the fork until well combined.

    Distribute equally between three baking cups (standard cupcake papers will not work). I also added 4 chocolate chips to the very center of each cupcake to make a bit of a molten center. Microwave on high for 1 to 1.5 minutes. The "cooking" time will depend largely on the power of your microwave. Mine took 1 minute 15 seconds.

    You want to let the cupcake cool a bit because right out of the microwave they are screaming hot. While they cool, make the frosting. Add the milk and the cream cheese to a bowl and beat on high until smooth and creamy. Then add the powdered sugar and the cocoa powder and beat until combined. Add the frosting to a zip lock bag and cut about 1/2 inch off the bottom corner. Pipe the frosting into the cupcake. Serve with a fork.

    Eat immediately. Right away. I’m serious.

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    Mango Wrapped Mozzarella


    I’m back. Sort of. When I say that I’m move into my new place, all that means is that my stuff is physically there. 

    In boxes. Lots and lots of boxes. But the gas isn’t on yet, so I can’t cook, and showers have been very cold. 

    Like this mango.

    So the theme for this week is about food you can cook without a stove.

    Which can be tricky. But when you are so sick of take out and pizza and all you want to do is cook a meal for your family and the stove is gas which hasn’t been turned on yet and the new place doesn’t have a microwave and your old place had a built in one that had to stay and you can’t figure out which of the billion boxes holds the cord to the electric griddle, you have to make do.  

    So this is what I made for breakfast for my first morning in the new house:

    Scrambled eggs in the waffle maker. Totally works. 

    Bacon cooked on an electric crepes maker. 

    Toast. 

    It may have been my most creative use of heating elements, but it wasn’t the most delicious breakfast ever to be made by my hands. 

    In keeping with the motto of my life: Figure out what is great about the situation that you are in and enjoy the crap out of it, I decided to give you a tasty treat that requires no cooking. It only has three ingredients and the only tricky part is shaving the mango with the vegetable peeler. But even if you need two of three strips of mango to go around the mozzarella ball, who cares. Its easy and tasty and looks fancy. Don’t sweat it. 

    I hope to bring you pictures of my new place soon, right now the mess isn’t nearly charming enough to be photogrpahed. Except Taters room, it’s her perfect little sanctuary in the midst of the chaos, even the pictures are hung and every box has been unpacked. Other than that, the rest can wait. 

    Mango Wrapped Mozzarella

    1 large mango

    12 Bocconcini or Ciliegine sized mozzarella balls

    2 tbs balsamic vinegar 

    Peel the mango with a vegetable peeler. once the peel has been removed, shave thin slices of the mango with the vegetable peeler until you have enough to cover the mozzarella balls. 

    Wrap the mozzarella balls with the mango slices and secure with a toothpick. Drizzle with balsamic vinegar. 

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    Chocolate Pretzel Beer Toffee

    The best part about visiting a brewery is the opportunity to sample those special release beers that never make it into bottles. Those brews that are only made in small batches, put into casks that sometimes make it to local pubs or events but will never make it into bottles in your local distributors shelves. Like those songs your favorite band will never record but will occasionally play live if you happen to catch a show on the right night, these are beers that make you feel special for having been granted the experience. In a world where it seems everything is accessible with the right google word search, these near mythical concoctions are only available to those who happen to be in the right place at the right time.

    One of my favorites is the Habanero Sculpin from Ballast point. Because of the process they use, the heat is fresh and bright. An uncooked scorch that isn’t shy. Habaneros are an extremely unpredictable ingredient, with heat levels that vary widely from pepper to pepper, making every cask of Habanero Sculpin different from the last. If you ever make it down to San Diego, stop in for a pint and count yourself among the special few.

    Since I wasn’t able to get my hands on any Habanero Sculpin, I found myself fixated on this Ballast Point Calico Amber Ale. And the result was a toffee that I couldn’t stop eating. So addictive, and it only takes about 20 minutes to make. I already have plans to make and hand this out as Christmas gifts, if I can wait that long to make it again.

    Chocolate Pretzel Amber Ale Toffee

    Chocolate Pretzel Beer Toffee

    Ingredients
      

    Toffee:

    • 1 Cup Sugar
    • 1 Cup Butter 2 sticks
    • 1/2 Cup Amber Ale

    Topping:

    • 2 Cups Pretzels Smashed
    • 2 Cups Dark Chocolate Chips 60% caco content
    • 1/4 Cup Amber Ale or Chocolate Stout

    Instructions
     

    • In a large pot over high heat add the sugar, butter and 1/2 cup amber ale, it will triple in volume during the cooking process so make sure to use a large pot. Stir until the mixture starts to boil. Allow to boil untouched until the mixture starts to darken and thicken at about 230 degrees. Stir continuously until it turns a very dark amber and hits 290 degrees. This process will take between 15 and 20 minutes from start to finish. pour onto a baking sheet covered with parchment paper or a Silpat. Allow to cool.
    • Add the chocolate to a large bowl. Heat the beer until hot but not boiling. You can heat it on a pot on the stove or microwave it in a microwave safe bowl. If you use the microwave, know that the beer will foam up once it reaches it's boiling point. Pour the hot beer over the chocolate chips and stir until well combined and melted.
    • Pour the chocolate over the toffee and smooth out in an even layer. Sprinkle the crushed pretzels over the chocolate and chill until the chocolate has set. Cut into pieces.

    Notes

    If you use a chocolate with less than 60% cocoa content, it will have higher levels of milk solids, because of this it will have a more difficult time hardening once the beer is added. Try to fine 60% and chill it to set.

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