When you’re a kid, there are monsters in the closet. Monsters that terrify you, chill your blood and ice your bones. You don’t know they aren’t real, because to you they exist in a way that’s as real as death and taxes.
When we grow up the monsters don’t leave our lives, they just change shape. They come in scarier bigger forms that exist outside our closets. Conversations that need to be had, admissions that need to see light, relationships that need to end. And what we often can’t see is that the monster is bigger when it’s in the dark, it can only control us if it stays hidden. Once we unleash the beast, and face his teeth, it’s often that he’s much smaller than we would have thought. More often than not, his power isn’t what we’d imagined.
And now we have space for all those things the monster would have eaten up. I’ve faced some recently. I’ve found courage. Not without tears, not without consequence, but in a way that feels like I am finally able to figure out what I was really scared of all along.
And it wasn’t quite the monster I’d imagined.