Asparagus and Sausage Meatball Orzo with Parmesan Beer Cream Sauce

I get a little itchy if I don’t get to cook. The way musicians get when you keep them away from a stage, or an athlete when you take the ball away or how a runner will start to chew on the curtains if he can’t get out on the road. Even on the tail end […]

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Chocolate Stout Caramel Tart with Pretzel Crust

  I was stuck in an elevator once. I was in college, on my way to a job interview. The elevator was supposed to deposit me on the 9th floor a perfect 6 minutes before my interview time. But somewhere between the 4th and 5th floor, the elevator jolted to a stop, the doors slightly […]

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Beer Brined Pepper Lime Chicken with Gorgonzola and Blackberries

    I was once asked to be in a porn movie. I was 21. I was a social worker for gang members, working with a rough crowd of teenagers in an unsavory section of Los Angeles. On a particularly frustrating day of trying to convince a hot-tempered kid why punching his teacher wasn’t a “dope […]

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Blackberry Beer Pie Bars

I’m good at things, probably more things than I should be good at given the fact that I ignore these irrelevant gifts. I can dance salsa, I have an exaggerated ability to fold fitted sheets, I can draw cartoons, I can get grocery store clerks to admit embarrassing secrets, and I make the worlds best chocolate […]

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Porter Marinated Steak Skewers with Cilantro Horseradish Cream

We have caveman like instincts, I have lots. I have this nearly uncontrollable urge to knock over that giant tower of perfectly stacked wine glasses in Crate & Barrel. I walk past, barely glancing at the shimmering tower that’s mocking me from it’s white square pedestal as I clutch my purse tightly and imagine swinging […]

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Beer Brat Dogs with Grilled Peach Salsa and Fried Onions

I tried to make sausage from scratch once. I went to Lindy & Grundy and had along talk with the gorgeous Sausage Making Queen of Los Angeles, Amelia. Armed with sausage casings,  several different types of pork and pork fat to be ground, and tips for success from the pros who instruct the pros, I […]

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Beer Brined Scallops over Spinach Salad With Bacon Stout Dressing

If you’re going to make me a salad, it better be a damn good salad. After all, you’re asking me to skip carbs and satisfying fried finger foods, I might resent you if it isn’t a really good salad. Bacon is a good start, and so is beer. Scallops are a fan favorite as well. […]

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Fried Beer Chicken Sliders with Beer Pickled Peaches and Jalapenos

  Slider has always been one of those skeevy words that I’ve tried to avoid, like, well the word “skeevy” or the unfortunate times I’m forced to use the word “moist.” Like the way “wooded area” is almost always followed by “dead body” or how the word “penetrate” should never be used outside a seventh […]

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Cherry Vanilla Pale Ale Party Cake

  I’m a huge fan of ridiculous cakes. My Epic Chocolate Stout Cake has three layers of cake and three layers of chocolate fudge. My Lemon Dream Cake is similar. I even spent years making obnoxiously large cakes shaped like hamburgers and sharks, and by the way, who cares if a cake is shaped like […]

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Beer Pesto Chicken with Creamy Parmesan Pale Ale Polenta

  Polenta makes me feel like an asshole, but I can’t stop making it. Like the way that Giada over pronounces Italian words and Midwestern transplants start using phrases like “taking holiday” once they move to Beverly Hills, it feels disingenuous. Polenta is corn grits, I live in America. I pronounce croissant and mascarpone in […]

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